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The Best of Period Basis: Lol Ship Fits

Friday, July 30th, 2010

The Captains Log 30/7

Solarsystem: PA-VE3

Shiptype: Ares Class Interceptor

The killmails for our current contract in Period Basis has provided us with plenty of amusement, which I thought I would share with all of you.

The Neutralizing Claw – A speedy litte ship that not only tackles you but nukes your cap… as well as its own allowing it to die a horrible death.

The Neuting Expanded Cargo Tackler Bruitx – Following the lead of the neutralizing claw this Brutix will tackle you and neut you to death. However unlike the claw this pilot recognized that this fit would nuke his own cap and therefore filled his lows with cargohold expanders; no doubt for all the cap boosters he planned on using but didn’t have.

Frigate Killing Nemesis – The objective of this Nemesis is to sneak up on unsuspecting frigates and reduce them to space dust with its smartbomb, laser and missile launcher.

Tackler Nemesis – Screw sneaking up on a person, that is the cowards path. This Nemesis gets up close and personal with you, preventing your ship from warping out while removing your tank piece by piece.

Cap Free Dual Cap Booster Scorpion – When your ship requires no cap to run its modules (other than a salvager) the only solution is to fit a dual Cap Booster to ensure your Cap never runs out.

Bemused Sentinel – Using your ship bonuses is for pussies. Real men ignore ship bonuses.

Neutralizing Vengeance – Legiunea ROmana seem to like their neut ships. They must know something we don’t.

Pacifist Thorax – In an attempt to obtain mercy this pilot refused to fit his ship at all.

Killer Sabre – This guy recognizes that he has one job to do, bubble the enemy no matter what, therefore why would you need to utilize the rest of his high slots?

The Ambushing Tanky Hyperion – This Hyperion will sneak up on your ship where upon it will use its dual shield booster to tank your damage and when that fails him, his dual armor rep will save him.

A Fighting Chance Coromorant – This guy wanted to give his opponents a fight chance to win by fitting only half the guns he can.

Drone Away Nidhoggur – Carriers are used to launch fighters into battle. Why would you need high slots?

Overpowered Zealot – Zealots are so overpowered they have no need of high slots… or tanks for that matter.

 

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Wormhole Treasures

Thursday, July 15th, 2010

The Captains Log 15/7

Solarsystem: Unknown

Shiptype: Armageddon Class Battleship

 

In wormholes there are plenty of treasures to be found; such as POS’s that are about to come out of reinforced. Now you may ask how is this a treasure? Well its quite simple. If a POS is in reinforced it means that someone has put it into reinforced and therefore someone has to come back and finish destroying it; which means we can get ourselves a fight.

So we got a remote rep Battleship fleet together in preparation for destroying some random fleet and at a random POS.  15 minutes before the POS was due to come out of reinforced a Chained Reaction fleet consisting of a Manticore, Hound, Sleipnir, Nighthawk, 2x Armageddon’s, Raven and a Typhoon landed on the WH and proceeded to move to the POS.

That was our queue. Our Broadsword went in got initial aggro and points and was promptly destroyed. That was all right though because as he blew up we landed and proceeded to annihilate the enemy fleet (Battle Report). Unfortunate the Hound and Typhoon got away, but you can’t have everything I guess.

After wiping out that fleet we removed the control tower they were shooting as well and used the Badger Mark II and Bestower the original POS had left there to haul all his POS modals out. It was at this time a pilot affliated with them contacted us about what had just happened.

Lyanca > any of you guys mind sharing a battle report on my carebear friends you guys just raped in J102602

Lyanca > these guys don’t post their lossmails

Sorakage > why did you want to kill that pos ? something personal ? or .. ?

Lyanca > I don’t know why they did sorakage

Lyanca > but we usually siege badly defended pos’s in wh space

Lyanca > random

Sorakage > we randomly killed you :)

Lyanca > you weren’t even hired?

Alekseyev Karrde > nope

Lyanca > that’s frikkin excellent

Alekseyev Karrde > prober found hole w rf’d pos, we kept eyes to see what would show up to kill it

Alekseyev Karrde > unfortunatly for them the highsec entrance was 4j from our base this week

Sorakage > we weren`t going contract mode, or everything would have died , hound+ phoon

Lyanca > yeah well played

Lyanca > lol

Lyanca > almost happy I wasn’t there

 

All I can say is bad luck for them. They randomly find a POS they want to destroy and we randomly find them.

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The Intersection of Real Life and Eve

Wednesday, July 7th, 2010

The Captains Log 7/7

Solarsystem: GA9P-0

Shiptype: Nightmare Class Battleship

I have some good news people! I have passed all my unit subjects! It was touch and go on my Biochemistry course but I managed to obtain enough marks on my final exam.

There is bad news as well though. I lost my Nightmare which I had for a whole 5 days. While I was checking out my uni results and reading emails associated with them on my iPhone a AAA gang consisting of a Tempest, Dramiel and a Buzzard came into our pocket.

 It was reported in Intel, but I didn’t see that.

They jumped into local, but I didn’t notice.

They warped in on top of me and I didn’t see them.

When I did notice it was too late. The Tempest had ECM and neuts fitted so I couldn’t shoot back and my cap, already severely depleted from shooting rats, just melted away.

Furthermore, I was in my own fleet with my carrier pilot and a neutral probing alt, used to find plexs, so my corp mates couldn’t warp to me straight away. This was further compounded by me freezing for bit and not leaving my fleet quickly enough to join the defence fleet that was already up.

So what should you take from this.

  1. iPhones are evil, don’t get one
  2. Since you don’t have an iPhone pay attention to Intel channels
  3. If you don’t do that at least pay attention to local
  4. More importantly, always be in a local defence fleet

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Posted in PvP | 6 Comments »

Karma Strikes

Monday, July 5th, 2010

The Captains Log 4/7

Solarsystem: Ashab

Shiptype: Punisher Class Frigate

 

A war dec was placed on my alt corp recently. This happens every now and then when someone notices that my Empire POS is offline and that they may be able to steal the modals I have on it, which is what I used to do. Normally, this is no problem as I just online the POS and its defences and the attacking corp will drop their war dec.

The recent war dec was initiated by Flaming White Hot Penguins, a corp that has existed for 4 days and controlled by a CEO who is only a couple of days older. Evidently this is an alt corp in which more members will join the corporation once the war dec goes active. There is one thing that is different about this war dec compared to the others though; it was to go live during my prime time, which gave me the opportunity to defend it and potentially get some kills out of it.

So I check the POS to see how much fuel it has, 5 days worth, nice, and there is plenty of time to haul some moon reaction goo from my wormhole POS’s before the war dec goes live. So I set my freighter on autopilot and off I go. During that journey I get a notification, which I didn’t look at as I presumed it was just informing me that one of my wormhole POS was running out of fuel. Turns out it wasn’t. Instead it was a notification informing me that my Corporate Hanger Array was under attack. Turns out I fail at reading comprehension as the war dec started today instead of tomorrow.

So I rush back to Ashab and jump in my Punisher and go to my POS. However, the war targets are gone, though are still in system, and my corporate hanger array is destroyed. It was a good thing I didn’t have anything of value in it.

I then warped to the station and watched a war target undock in a Providence. I cried out in frustration as I started shooting him only to watch him warp as I had no point on my Punisher.

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Oh no you Didn’t.

Friday, July 2nd, 2010

The Captains Log 2/7

Solarsystem: Unknown

So I was catching up on blog posts (I haven’t read or written a blog post for about three weeks due to uni exams etc) when I came across a post written by Wench with a Wrench. Essentially her corporation, Adhocracy, had decided it was great idea to take down another corporation WH POS. The defending corporation then decided to hire Noir to A) save their POS and B) remove the enemy POS from the WH.

Now, allot of our members don’t like POS save/POS removal contracts because they are boring and we have to return to the POS to finish it off one day and 17 hours later. So as we are taking down Adhocracy POS’s our FC had a great idea… why don’t start negotiations with Adhocracy and get them to take down the POS. This benefits everyone as the POS is removed, we don’t have to shoot the POS and the enemy gets to keeps their POS. Apparently, Adhocracy thought this was great ideas as well as they agreed to our terms, we would help to rep the modules we had damaged and they would take the POS down immediately.

For the next part of this post listen to this song.

Everything was going well until it came time to taking down the POS itself. Adhocracy didn’t want to take it down as some of their players were still logged in at the POS but were offline. Therefore they wanted us to wait 6 hours until those members would be back and be able to remove themselves from the POS and the WH. (Pro tip: Never log of at a POS. When you log back on you may find that it has being rap caged and you are trapped). Now this is what we call reneging on a contract. When we say that your POS is to be removed immediately, that does not mean take all your modules off then remove the POS 6 hours later. Immediately means now.

When this occurs there is only one appropriate response. You take it down now or we will take it down for you. We started regathering our fleet in preparation for round two of the POS removal when Adhocracy came to their senses and decided that immediately does mean now and not 6 hours later. I don’t think Adhocracy actually realise how close they were to losing that POS. We take reneging on a deal very seriously at Noir. If you do it we get pissed. When we get pissed we like to shoot people; namely the people who reneged on deal.

Keep that in mind when you decide to hire us.

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Posted in Alliance Ops, PvP | 7 Comments »

Alliance Tournament VIII

Monday, June 7th, 2010

The Captains Log 7/6

Solarsystem: Amarr

Station: Emperor Family Academy

 

The first round of the Alliance Tournament VIII is over, including the round involving my alliance, Noir. Mercenary Group fighting against Death From Above.


 

Noir. Mercenary Group

Claymore

Nighthawk

Scimitar

3 x Sleipnir

2 x Daredevil

 

Death From Above

Basilisk

Vulture

Tengu

Raven Navy Issue

Badger

Curse

Hugin

Daredevil

Thrasher

For those of you watching the AT8 stream or you the YouTube video you will know by now that we lost our first round, which went against allot of the predictions people had made. In fact we only managed to kill two ships in our fight, the Thrasher and the Daredevil.

So what happened? Why did we lose?

Talking to our FC afterwards he described what happened during the battle. The first problem was the Curse. While our ships were not using active tanks or weapons that used caps, they did need cap to run their hardeners, which once they went offline severely affected their buffer tank. The second problem, though to a lesser extent, was tracking disrupters, which managed to reduce some the DPS coming from our Sleipnir’s.

The biggest problem we experienced though was a lack of situational awareness. During the fight our FC ordered all DPS to be placed onto the basilisk in the belief that it was performing a remote rep function. Turns this was not the case it, it was the Tengu and our FC didn’t realise this until it was too late. That is what killed us. If all of our DPS had of been placed on the Tengu allot earlier their setup would have failed. In fact the Tengu would have died quite fast, as you can see in the video, our Nighthawk managed to knock it down to half shields by its self.

So from out little fight you can see that alliance tournament matches don’t just come down the best setup but also how well the FC does.

Props goes out to Roastedpot, one of our Daredevil pilots who managed to not die during the match and spent some time orbiting around the arena. He even got some fanmail during the match.

LOL
From: Jessica Lane
Sent: 2010.06.05 19:40
To: Roastedpot,

Keep being a dick! Orbit forever!

—-

HEY U SUCK SO Much!!!!!!!!!
From: Kinky Panda
Sent: 2010.06.05 19:45
To: Roastedpot,

haha ur such a puss u suck why dont u die like a man

—–

god speed
From: UberSmudge
Sent: 2010.06.05 19:45
To: Roastedpot,

god speed little daredevil
god speed

 

So now that is over it is time for some rage.

During the alliance commentary CCP stated that as mercenaries we would have spies in all the alliance tournament teams. This made allot of our members quite angry as we do not use spies. If we beat you it is because we are simply better then you not through having spies to follow all your movements and relay Intel to us. For another thing, it is simply impractical to utilise spies. We get contracts quite regularly and often with little warning, which makes it rather impractical to get spies into target corporations in a time frame for them to be useful. So do not accuse us of utilising spies. We not the Guiding Hand Social Club.

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The Good Fight

Tuesday, May 25th, 2010

The Captains Log

SolarSystem: J100616

Shiptype:  Vagabond Class Heavy Assult Ship

 

I log into our little pocket and notice that there is a neutral, who is a member of Sleepless Psychos, in HP-. Now I want kill, so I decided to sit on the HP- gate in my newly acquired Vagabond and wait for him to come to me.

However this was not to happen. Vaelastra, one of ze Germans, jumps onto comms and tells us all to get into HP- and warp to him. He has found a Wormhole that currently has a Raven, Rook and Pilgrim sitting on the entrance. My Vagabond was the first into the breach and as soon as I loaded the grid I panicked upon seeing my shields drop the half of what they were, thankfully though it was just the Pulsar in the system increasing my Shield capacity by 85%.

Primary was called on the Raven and I started to laying into it with my Autocannons. Then the battle started to heat up. A hostile Onyx and Tengu warped in so primary was called on the Tengu. Then an Orca warped in….. so we destroyed it and put the mystery of a battle Orca behind us as two more Hostile Tengus landed on grid. Talking to the enemy combatants after the battle was over we found that the Orca had been squad warped. Poor guy.

The hostile and Pilgrim, Raven and Rook we had originally intended to engage warped out leaving us with three Tengus and an Onyx to fight. While our fleet numbers had increased with a mixture of random ships. The call was going throughout our alliance that we needed more ships and more DPS. The Tengus we were fighting were very well fitted with Shield Transfers on each ship that gave them the equivalent of three Scimitars repairing each other.

We lost our first ship, a Pilgrim, to the Tengus. This was the first major fight I had been in my Vagabond. When I first got it I asked for some advice in how to fly and I was given some simple and easy to follow advice. Stay out of scram range. If you get scrammed you are dead. I followed this to the letter and whenever I saw the Tengus heading towards me I burned out from them. Unfortunately, Sunstroke in his Vagabond wasn’t so lucky. The Vagabond loss was then followed by a Drake.

So far we were losing this battle, and that would not stand.

The battle began to swing in our favour when an enemy Curse landed, which was a major threat to us as it would be able to neut our capacitor, tacking out our propulsion mods and allowing those Tengus to run us down. Unfortunately for the Curse though, he landed away from the Tengus and was promptly tackled and destroyed. A hostile Cyclone also landed on the field, but couldn’t tank the DPS we poured into it. As the Cyclone was going down the enemy Onyx dropped its bubble and left the field, only to come back in a Falcon. The Falcon was pointed by GreenYoshi in his Cynbal, however the Falcon jammed him. The Falcon wasn’t going to get away that easily though, as I got a point on him as well. The paper tank on the Falcon soon collapsed and we had another kill in the bag.

With the Falcons destruction and our numbers increasing the Tengus decided it was time bail. They deaggressed and burned back towards the wormhole, which they jumped through. We promptly followed them through only to watch them jump back into the wormhole. We followed them again and watched as one Tengu warped off and the other two Tengus get caught in our Broadswords bubble. That was the end of those Tengus. While they were able to remote repair each other when all three of them were present, two of them couldn’t keep up the DPS been pumped out ships. One Tengu was destroyed, marking my first T3 kill ever followed by the second Tengu.  

After slogging it out with Sleepless Psychos for 10 minutes Noir had prevailed.

This is probably the best battle I have ever been in while playing Eve. It wasn’t a Gank and we were not fighting a Blob. It was a fight against a well organised corporation that knew what they were doing. It was a fair fight. My hat goes off Sleepless Psychos for bringing us that fight.

Related Posts.  

Mynxee’s account of the battle 

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Sometimes you’re lucky and other times you aren’t.

Saturday, May 8th, 2010

The Captains Log 8/5

SolarSystem: GA9P-0

Station: Suo Tamaki House of Refinem

About once every week I need to haul fuel and minerals and to my WH POS. I normally do this by afk auto piloting my freighter from a trade hub to the wormhole entry system and then once my POS’s have all the fuel and minerals they need I auto pilot back to a trade hub. Now one day after I have travelled to my wormhole entry system and I am getting ready to head back, I set my autopilot to Jita and its tells me the safest route to Jita will take me through two low sec systems. Looking at Dotlan maps I notice the system I am in is surrounded by low sec systems. All of a sudden it dawns on me that I have auto piloted through two low sec systems in freighter and I did not get it blown up. Sometimes I am bloody lucky.

 

Recently we were contracted to kill as many Rouge Elements pilots as possible (/me waves at Havv0c) out in Insmother. Upon jumping into R-RAEL to get to the contract area, there was a little gate camp with some sucker bubbles set up, well that was no problem for me, so I warped of to a planet from which I intended to warp to the exit gate. The exit gate though was camped and I got sucked into one of the three drag bubbles they had set up. The guys camping the gate though were already involved in combat, which I thought was lucky for me as it would give me a chance to get out of the camp. However, I wasn’t that a lucky. A Vagabond noticed me, pointed and began to follow me as I made a beeline back to the gate. My shield got striped, my armour got torn off and started to take structure damage. The gate was just there. I was about to make it, if only my structure didn’t give way.

I got within jump range.

I spammed the jump button.

I jumped, with 26% structure left.

Fuck I’m good.

With my get away done I warped to the next gate jumped and was promptly killed by a Sabre.

Sometimes your unlucky.

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When Black Ops Hot Drops go Wrong

Saturday, April 17th, 2010

The Captains Log 17/4

Solarsystem: 2V-CS5

Shiptype: Cerberus Class Heavy Assult Ship

Well not for us but for TREAD alliance. Noir. had a camp set up in our Providence pocket when word reached us that a Arazu that had Black Ops support was coming towards us. Plans were put into motion to set up a trap that would net us their whole gang.

The first step was letting the Arazu into our constellation where upon he scouted around looking for an easy kill, which he failed to find. On his way out of the pocket he noticed Laevateinn, who has a 46mill bounty on his Pod, sitting on the exit gate in a Rapier. The Arazu decided to engage.

He scrambled Laevateinn

He lit his Covert Cyno

The enemy Recon and Stealthbomber gang jumped in … and were promptly bubbled by our interdictor.

The rest of our hac fleet jumped in and began to slaughter the enemy fleet. Two falcons went down. Two Arazu’s were destroyed. A Rapier got away, only to be caught in a drag bubble and splattered across space. Three Manticores where destroyed by our interceptors pilots who ran around tackling them and destroying them one by one. Then there was the hound that fell to the combined might of our squad (not that it needed it).

We took out their whole gang without a single loss. All up TREAD lost a billion ISK in ships with their failed Black Ops hot drop. Why did it fail so badly? Because they engaged us on a gate without a scout on the other side.

Pro tip – Use scouts.

Battle Report

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Posted in PvP | 6 Comments »

Welcome to the Noir. State

Thursday, April 15th, 2010

The Captains Log 15/4

Solarsystem: HP-6Z6

Ship: Armageddon Class Battleship

 

As Julius Ceaser once said (sort of) We came. We saw. We conquered. Over the last few days Noir. has being tacking sovereignty in the systems in the H-KW4A constellation in Providence, which can be seen below.

 

As you can see it is a nice little constellation that is easily defendable with one entry system,  it contains four stations and has a decent amount of belts, not that it matters much when we have anomalies.

 

I was present for the capture of the first system that came out of reinforced, H9-J8N, in which my Chimera, Pride of the Pantheon, got its first combat experience. For the most part AAA did the hard work while Noir. shot the last little bit of structure so the station flipped over to us.

 

Conquest: You can see the Armageddon I was flying and my Chimera in this picture.

Once the station flipped over to us we than went and destroyed the CVA Territorial Claim Unit, with the might of the AAA cap fleet it was reduced to space dust within a couple minutes, and put up our own TCU.

Down with the Empire: Removing the TCU and the trace of CVA from our new system.

 

Noir. isn’t the only alliance to gain space in Providence recently, in fact our little campaign has been part of larger push by AAA to remove CVA from providence completely and install new sov holders in what is being termed New Providence. New Providence is going to hold about 20 or sov holding alliances who will not engage in territorial warfare against each other, but will still be involved in roaming gangs. If you really want to know more about I suggest you check out this thread, it covers what has been happening in providence quite well.

Of course with Noir. tacking a slice of the 0.0 pie there was a lot talk on the Kugutsmen forums about Noir’s future intentions in regards to holding sov and about our future relationship with AAA. The official Noir blog covers this pretty well. effectively once our space is secure we are going to be resetting our standings with AAA and will engage in combat with them, either on contract or off contract. Our space is in reality going to be holiday home where we can come and make a bit of ISK in-between contracts and keep our PvP skills up to scratch and will not be something that holds a large sway over us. It is there to serve us, not for us to serve it.

Looking for renters

With us holding sov though Noir. leadership has decided that we will rent our systems to our to people that would like a little bit of 0.0 action. You will have access to all four stations in our constellations as well ratting and mining rights and you will also be able to set up a POS for a small fee. Furthermore, you will be able to join our alliance, Lucky Starbase Syndicate and not even have to worry about setting standings with corps or alliances. It will cost you 100mill per month, a real bargain (it used to cost my old alliance 3 billion a month to rent a constellation in Esoteria). For information either join our public channel “Cafe Noir.” (don’t forget the . at the end of Noir.) or contact Asuka Smith. 

 

Realated Posts

Providence Murder Train

Resistance is Futile

Preperation for War

This is Noir. Country <– by Mynxee

Providence Invasion <– by Hallan

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