Solarsystem: PA-VE3

Shiptype: Ares Class Interceptor

The killmails for our current contract in Period Basis has provided us with plenty of amusement, which I thought I would share with all of you.

The Neutralizing Claw – A speedy litte ship that not only tackles you but nukes your cap… as well as its own allowing it to die a horrible death.

The Neuting Expanded Cargo Tackler Bruitx – Following the lead of the neutralizing claw this Brutix will tackle you and neut you to death. However unlike the claw this pilot recognized that this fit would nuke his own cap and therefore filled his lows with cargohold expanders; no doubt for all the cap boosters he planned on using but didn’t have.

Frigate Killing Nemesis – The objective of this Nemesis is to sneak up on unsuspecting frigates and reduce them to space dust with its smartbomb, laser and missile launcher.

Tackler Nemesis – Screw sneaking up on a person, that is the cowards path. This Nemesis gets up close and personal with you, preventing your ship from warping out while removing your tank piece by piece.

Cap Free Dual Cap Booster Scorpion – When your ship requires no cap to run its modules (other than a salvager) the only solution is to fit a dual Cap Booster to ensure your Cap never runs out.

Bemused Sentinel – Using your ship bonuses is for pussies. Real men ignore ship bonuses.

Neutralizing Vengeance – Legiunea ROmana seem to like their neut ships. They must know something we don’t.

Pacifist Thorax – In an attempt to obtain mercy this pilot refused to fit his ship at all.

Killer Sabre – This guy recognizes that he has one job to do, bubble the enemy no matter what, therefore why would you need to utilize the rest of his high slots?

The Ambushing Tanky Hyperion – This Hyperion will sneak up on your ship where upon it will use its dual shield booster to tank your damage and when that fails him, his dual armor rep will save him.

A Fighting Chance Coromorant – This guy wanted to give his opponents a fight chance to win by fitting only half the guns he can.

Drone Away Nidhoggur – Carriers are used to launch fighters into battle. Why would you need high slots?

Overpowered Zealot – Zealots are so overpowered they have no need of high slots… or tanks for that matter.

The quote comes from Farscape, and for those of you on iPhones the quote is “When the last warrior was dying, he said: ‘We gave you everything. Why did you destroy us?’ And, she looked down upon him, and she whispered… ‘Because I can.’

I know the image of the female with the Gun is a little rough, but what I can I say I have had no training on photoshop etc (if you reckon you can do better do so).

Solarsystem: Unknown

Shiptype: Heron Class Frigate

It was that time of the week when I had to log on to my industry alts and probe a wormhole exit to get my moon reaction goo out of the wormhole and POS fuel in. This time though, things went wrong. My first probing alt found a wormhole exit, however it went to another wormhole; not the one what I wanted. So I probed down a second wormhole and warped to it only to find a Legion on it. I was too far out to jump and didn’t have enough time to warp out. So I lost my probing ship and my Pod.

That’s no big deal though. I have second prober in my wormhole system for such emergencies. The wormhole was probed down, I warped to it at a hundred and bookmarked it while waving at the hostile fleet on it. I Warped back to 0, jump through it …. and found myself in the enemy’s wormhole system. Upon jumping back through they had a bubble up and my second prober was killed.

I had no more probers left.

My probers were now outside of the wormhole.

I didn’t know where my wormhole exited.

My POS’s were running out of fuel.

I was fucked.

Zaurak Bham’s Raiders is a corporation that has also set up shop in my wormhole. Now when they first set up in there they were operating out of a lightly defended small POS, which would be easy to take out if I needed to do so at some time in the future. I didn’t do this though as they were running plexs etc which I didn’t run.  

Then they got a large POS.

Put on some heavy defences.

Then anchored and onlined an X-large ship assembly array, which is used to build capital ships.

Now I was defiantly thinking about removing that POS. It was a good thing I didn’t though. With both my probers traped outside of my wormhole I sent Eve Mails to all of their members that I knew off asking for a entrance system. As my luck would have it they gave me one.

I was saved.

A couple of points to begin with

• They have a 30km flight time and a 15km explosion radius.
• Your intended targets should really be frigate, destroyer or cruiser class hulls (unless flying in large numbers). Anything above that will have the tank to deal with you.
• Bombs deal different damage types – Concussion/kinetic, Shrapnel/explosive, Scorch/thermal and Electron/EM
• Bombs have a 99.5 resistance to the type of damage they do
  • Eg. concussion bombs deal kinetic damage and have 99.5 resistance to kinetic damage BUT NO OTHER DAMAGE TYPE
• What does this mean? If multiple Stealth Bombers fire bombs of different damage types at the same time, they will blow each other up.
  • Eg. A Hound fires a Shrapnel then a Manticore fires a Concussion bomb at the same target. The Shrapnel bomb will detonate first and blow up the Concussion bomb, meaning it will do 0 damage.
• Bombs are affected by sig radius’s. The smaller the ship the less damage a bomb will do (remember this changes with the fittings being used and what modules are active, MWD etc)
• You do not need to target your intended victim to fire a bomb. A bomb will fly in the direction you ship is pointing for 30km and then explode. They are a launch and forget weapon.
• Unlike missiles you can warp and they will still do damage.

And personally my golden rule is: Fly in groups not solo. Bombs don’t do that much damage; most ships will survive one hit from a bomb (eg my Rifter can). Therefore fly in groups of Stealth Bombs and shoot bombs together to get the maximum amount of kills you can.

And my silver rule: People are stupid. While some ships you cannot normally take on you still can because sometimes people will fail to fit a ship or not be paying attention etc. So if you see something you want to take on just for the hell of it who am I to argue. I have done this before and will again (like this Myrmidon kill). You never know you may get lucky.

Fitting

The objective of these fittings is to A) ensure you get of grid after your bomb has been launched and B) survive any damage that happens to be put on to you before you warp out. Modules that help you with survivability are shield extender modules and rigs while GTFO modules are items such as inertia stabs, nanofibres and Low Friction Nozzle Joint rigs. The modules with ** next to them should always be fitted (fitting from General Deathry).

High Slots

• **Covert Ops Cloaking Device
• **Bomb Launcher
• Expanded Probe Launcher
• Small Remote Armor Repair System
• Small Remote Hull Repair System

Medium Slots

• **1mn Microwarpdrive
• Small Shield Extender x2

Low Slots

• **Inertia Stabilizers
• Co-Processor
• Damage Control Unit

Rig Slot

• Small Low Friction Nozzle Joints x2

Preparation is everything  

Preparation is everything. If you set up a bombing run properly to begin with you are less likely to die and get the kill you want.

• Scout your target.
  • When you identify a possible target see what ships they have. Remember point 2 above; don’t waste your time on things you can’t kill. (Remember my silver rule)
  • Are there interceptors there? These ships can kill you easily. They will cover the distance between you and them in no time so always keep this in mind, you may want to pass them over if they have a large amount of Interceptors waiting.
  • Is there a bubble? Can you get a bubble there? Most of your intended targets will be able to warp out when they see a bomb being launched. Therefore you really need a bubble there to ensure they don’t escape.
• Getting into position
  • After you fire a bomb you want to get out alive. At 30km you are just out of point range for most ships, but a ship with good speed (Interceptors) can travel the 6km gap between you and their point range in a little over a second and locking you doesn’t take much longer.
  • All the Stealth Bombers have a base align time of around 8 seconds. Again this will vary with skills and fittings.
  • So the objective when setting up you bombing run is to be roughly aligned with a celestial as you fly towards your target to fire the bomb. As soon as you fire your bomb initiate warp to the celestial that is closest to the direction you are flying in. This will lower you align time as you will already be at max speed and just have to turn your ship that little bit to warp.
    • If you are in a system that you camp often or roam into often setup bookmarks near all the gate, stations, POS or whatever it is you like to camp that are around 35km from them and will allow you to roughly align to a celestial when you fly towards your target.
• Fire your bomb
  • The key part here is point and click = dead.
  • Make sure you have the celestial you are going to warp to selected in your overview and have your mouse hovering over the warp icon
  • Turn off your cloak using the relevant F# key.
  • Fire your bomb with using your F# key
  • Hit your warp button as soon as your bomb is gone.

If all has gone well your bomb will detonate on target, you will get some kills and most importantly have gotten out alive. 

Solarsystem: Unknown

Shiptype: Armageddon Class Battleship

In wormholes there are plenty of treasures to be found; such as POS’s that are about to come out of reinforced. Now you may ask how is this a treasure? Well its quite simple. If a POS is in reinforced it means that someone has put it into reinforced and therefore someone has to come back and finish destroying it; which means we can get ourselves a fight.

So we got a remote rep Battleship fleet together in preparation for destroying some random fleet and at a random POS.  15 minutes before the POS was due to come out of reinforced a Chained Reaction fleet consisting of a Manticore, Hound, Sleipnir, Nighthawk, 2x Armageddon’s, Raven and a Typhoon landed on the WH and proceeded to move to the POS.

That was our queue. Our Broadsword went in got initial aggro and points and was promptly destroyed. That was all right though because as he blew up we landed and proceeded to annihilate the enemy fleet (Battle Report). Unfortunate the Hound and Typhoon got away, but you can’t have everything I guess.

After wiping out that fleet we removed the control tower they were shooting as well and used the Badger Mark II and Bestower the original POS had left there to haul all his POS modals out. It was at this time a pilot affliated with them contacted us about what had just happened.

Lyanca > any of you guys mind sharing a battle report on my carebear friends you guys just raped in J102602

Lyanca > these guys don’t post their lossmails

Sorakage > why did you want to kill that pos ? something personal ? or .. ?

Lyanca > I don’t know why they did sorakage

Lyanca > but we usually siege badly defended pos’s in wh space

Lyanca > random

Sorakage > we randomly killed you

Lyanca > you weren’t even hired?

Alekseyev Karrde > nope

Lyanca > that’s frikkin excellent

Alekseyev Karrde > prober found hole w rf’d pos, we kept eyes to see what would show up to kill it

Alekseyev Karrde > unfortunatly for them the highsec entrance was 4j from our base this week

Sorakage > we weren`t going contract mode, or everything would have died , hound+ phoon

Lyanca > yeah well played

Lyanca > lol

Lyanca > almost happy I wasn’t there

All I can say is bad luck for them. They randomly find a POS they want to destroy and we randomly find them.

Solarsystem: GA9P-0

Shiptype: Nightmare Class Battleship

I have some good news people! I have passed all my unit subjects! It was touch and go on my Biochemistry course but I managed to obtain enough marks on my final exam.

There is bad news as well though. I lost my Nightmare which I had for a whole 5 days. While I was checking out my uni results and reading emails associated with them on my iPhone a AAA gang consisting of a Tempest, Dramiel and a Buzzard came into our pocket.

 It was reported in Intel, but I didn’t see that.

They jumped into local, but I didn’t notice.

They warped in on top of me and I didn’t see them.

When I did notice it was too late. The Tempest had ECM and neuts fitted so I couldn’t shoot back and my cap, already severely depleted from shooting rats, just melted away.

Furthermore, I was in my own fleet with my carrier pilot and a neutral probing alt, used to find plexs, so my corp mates couldn’t warp to me straight away. This was further compounded by me freezing for bit and not leaving my fleet quickly enough to join the defence fleet that was already up.

So what should you take from this.

1. iPhones are evil, don’t get one
2. Since you don’t have an iPhone pay attention to Intel channels
3. If you don’t do that at least pay attention to local
4. More importantly, always be in a local defence fleet

Solarsystem: Ashab

Shiptype: Punisher Class Frigate

A war dec was placed on my alt corp recently. This happens every now and then when someone notices that my Empire POS is offline and that they may be able to steal the modals I have on it, which is what I used to do. Normally, this is no problem as I just online the POS and its defences and the attacking corp will drop their war dec.

The recent war dec was initiated by Flaming White Hot Penguins, a corp that has existed for 4 days and controlled by a CEO who is only a couple of days older. Evidently this is an alt corp in which more members will join the corporation once the war dec goes active. There is one thing that is different about this war dec compared to the others though; it was to go live during my prime time, which gave me the opportunity to defend it and potentially get some kills out of it.

So I check the POS to see how much fuel it has, 5 days worth, nice, and there is plenty of time to haul some moon reaction goo from my wormhole POS’s before the war dec goes live. So I set my freighter on autopilot and off I go. During that journey I get a notification, which I didn’t look at as I presumed it was just informing me that one of my wormhole POS was running out of fuel. Turns out it wasn’t. Instead it was a notification informing me that my Corporate Hanger Array was under attack. Turns out I fail at reading comprehension as the war dec started today instead of tomorrow.

So I rush back to Ashab and jump in my Punisher and go to my POS. However, the war targets are gone, though are still in system, and my corporate hanger array is destroyed. It was a good thing I didn’t have anything of value in it.

I then warped to the station and watched a war target undock in a Providence. I cried out in frustration as I started shooting him only to watch him warp as I had no point on my Punisher.

Solarsystem: Unknown

So I was catching up on blog posts (I haven’t read or written a blog post for about three weeks due to uni exams etc) when I came across a post written by Wench with a Wrench. Essentially her corporation, Adhocracy, had decided it was great idea to take down another corporation WH POS. The defending corporation then decided to hire Noir to A) save their POS and B) remove the enemy POS from the WH.

Now, allot of our members don’t like POS save/POS removal contracts because they are boring and we have to return to the POS to finish it off one day and 17 hours later. So as we are taking down Adhocracy POS’s our FC had a great idea… why don’t start negotiations with Adhocracy and get them to take down the POS. This benefits everyone as the POS is removed, we don’t have to shoot the POS and the enemy gets to keeps their POS. Apparently, Adhocracy thought this was great ideas as well as they agreed to our terms, we would help to rep the modules we had damaged and they would take the POS down immediately.

For the next part of this post listen to this song.

Everything was going well until it came time to taking down the POS itself. Adhocracy didn’t want to take it down as some of their players were still logged in at the POS but were offline. Therefore they wanted us to wait 6 hours until those members would be back and be able to remove themselves from the POS and the WH. (Pro tip: Never log of at a POS. When you log back on you may find that it has being rap caged and you are trapped). Now this is what we call reneging on a contract. When we say that your POS is to be removed immediately, that does not mean take all your modules off then remove the POS 6 hours later. Immediately means now.

When this occurs there is only one appropriate response. You take it down now or we will take it down for you. We started regathering our fleet in preparation for round two of the POS removal when Adhocracy came to their senses and decided that immediately does mean now and not 6 hours later. I don’t think Adhocracy actually realise how close they were to losing that POS. We take reneging on a deal very seriously at Noir. If you do it we get pissed. When we get pissed we like to shoot people; namely the people who reneged on deal.

Keep that in mind when you decide to hire us.

Solarsystem: Amarr

Station: Emperor Family Academy

Welcome to the eighteenth installment of the EVE Blog Banter, the monthly EVE Online blogging extravaganza created by none other than me, CrazyKinux. The EVE Blog Banter involves an enthusiastic group of gaming bloggers, a common topic within the realm of EVE Online, and a week to post articles pertaining to the said topic. The resulting articles can either be short or quite extensive, either funny or dead serious, but are always a great fun to read! Any questions about the EVE Blog Banter should be directed to crazykinux@gmail.com. Check out other EVE Blog Banter articles at the bottom of this post!

On May 6th 2010, EVE Online celebrated its 7th Anniversary. Quite a milestone in MMO history, especially considering that it is one of the few virtual worlds out there to see its population continually grow year after year. For some of you who’ve been here since the very beginning, EVE has evolved quite a lot since its creation. With the expansion rolling out roughly twice a year, New Eden gets renewed and improved regularly. But, how about you the player? How has you gaming style evolved through the years or months since you’ve started playing? Have you always been a carebear, or roleplayer? Have you only focused on PvP or have you given other aspects of the game a chance – say manufacturing. Let’s hear your story!

Well those of you that follow my blog will have noticed that I have not been posting much lately, this has been due to end of semester exams at university and then about a week in which I played very little eve (spent most of it reading a book). Anyway enough of the excuses, it’s time for another post.

I started my career as a capsuleer of as a carebear blasting my way though Guristats Pirates out in Geminate, which was my only redeeming feature as I was 0.0 carbear and not a mission bear. In fact, I was such a carebear that I got a second account just to make carebearing easier and had no qualms leaving SMASH when if the times got tough (ie. GoonSwarm). I got turned off the whole PvP side of New Eden after I lost my Moa of doom, which was fitted with missile launchers, blasters and railguns (got to make sure you have all optimal ranges covered).

Despite this lack of enthusiasm towards PvP I did want to be involved in some of the epic fleet flights that occur when two alliances are nuking it out with each other so I set the long term goal of training a Sniper Rokh since it could shoot up 200km. Three years later I still can’t fit a T2 sniper Rokh, though I can now fit Sniper Apoc.

As my time in New Eden progressed I changed alliances, became a Co-CEO in a corp, helped precipitate a revolt in an alliance, formed a new alliance with other dissatisfied members, acted as a diplomat when our new alliance got kicked out of space we occupied, joined a new alliance and then managed to my corp kicked out of alliance. During this time I have flown in large sniper fleets and found that I prefer small gang PvP, one of the reasons I joined Noir. I now consider myself a PvP player who has given up his carebear ways. Instead of grinding it out with rats and missions I camp gates and roam the depths of enemy space, which is pretty much everyone.

This should be a lesson for all you carebears out there, it is not too late for you, turn away from your mining lasers and pick up your weapons. Get out there and fight and die; sweat and bleed it is good for you.